Doctor Talk
by Bryan Dacote
Summary: Admiral Leonard McCoy has led a long life, and is now inspecting the new Enterprise 1701-D. Data introduces the Old Doctor to the Holodeck where McCoy decides to have a friendly chat with an ordinary Doctor from the 1950's in the heat of the Korean War, while having some drinks.


Doctor Talk  
A Star Trek and MASH crossover story 

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Lieutenant Commander Data led the 137 year-old Admiral Leonard McCoy down the new corridors of the _Enterprise-D_. McCoy was both impressed and annoyed by the new-fangled technology of the latest carnation of his old ship's namesake, as Data showed him more of its features. They turned another of the many corridors and came to a large pair of orange doors. They looked sturdier or contained something more important; like it was a safe. However McCoy knew from his previous positions on starships that he, and the real-life version of the Tinman, were on a level of the ship where such a room was unheard of.  
The old Doctor raised a wrinkly finger at the bulk doors; Data's golden eyes following the gesture, then back to his superior officer.

"And what in Sam-Hell is this, Commander?" McCoy asked. Data looked back at the bulk orange doors. _For an advanced calculator, he's a little slow._ McCoy mused for a second.

"This is the Holodeck." Data stated without any emotion in his voice.

"Holodeck?"

"Holodeck; formally known as a Recreation Room in the 23rd Century. They were first installed and tested on _Constitution_ -class—" McCoy raised his hands to silence the android.

"Enough, enough. I don't need the full history. I was alive in the 23rd century and I remember the ol' Recreation Room, and all that holographic technology." Data's mouth formed an 'O' and nodded for an awkward moment.

"Would… the Admiral like to see the Holodeck?" Data asked. McCoy shrugged and nodded, Data approached the control panel next to the door and tapped it to make it light up and a beep emanate, and soothing voice that to McCoy; sounded like Nurse Chapel's voice.

"Please Enter Program." The computer said. Data looked at the Admiral then back to the panel.

"Computer, show the bridge of the Enterprise. Registry number; 1701, Original Constitution class, year; 2270."

"Program complete. Enter when ready." The computer resounded. Data looked at McCoy with what appeared to be an attempt at a smile, while the old Doctor's eyebrow raised in intrigue. Data walked towards the door, McCoy a few steps behind, as they approached the large doors opened to reveal the colorful bridge of the old _Enterprise_ that McCoy served on so long ago. McCoy gasped in awe at the detail of the facsimile, as he followed the android onto the bridge from just right of the navigator's station. McCoy looked around as he walked around the old bridge, feeling the smoothness of the red railing, stepping down and sitting in Kirk's old chair. He sat and tried to gauge how comfy the chair was that he sat in, before looking at Data with a smile.

"I never did sit in this chair before. I never did wonder while this old bucket of bolts was around, at how comfy The Chair was until…" he trailed off to look around again, this time with a somber look in his old eyes. "Until she was burning through the skies of the Genesis Planet." He wiped at a tear in his eye before refacing the 2nd in-command of the newest _Enterprise_. "So, what else can this Holodeck do? Can it bring up people? Fictional or real?"

"Yes, Admiral." McCoy smiled and slowly stood from the Captain's chair and rejoined Data next to the entryway.

"May I?" McCoy asked with a small grin. Data nodded and pressed the panel and the computer repeated its request for input. "Computer, I would like a bar in… the late 20th Century Earth, North America. San Francisco area—no; Tokyo, Japan." The computer acknowledged his request and before his eyes, the bridge of the old _Enterprise_ was replaced with a small bar from Tokyo in the 20th century. The two Starfleet officers walked towards the bar. McCoy sitting at the bar, and Data taking position behind the counter.

"Would you like any company, sir?" Data asked. McCoy nodded and looked to the arch.

"Computer, do you have on record a Doctor from the mid to late 20th century; he was a Captain from the United States Army named Benjamin Franklin Pierce?"

"Yes, there is an individual by that name on record."

"Can you have him appear?"

"Affirmative."

"Good, then do so." And with that a tall man with black, messy hair appeared, motionless and blank. As if he had no soul. "Computer, can you implement his personality from records of the era?"

"Affirmative." With that Captain Pierce's eyes blinked a few times before realizing where he was, and as if it was second nature; he walked to the bar and sat down and looked at Data with a perplexed look.

"Well, you're an odd-looking bartender, aren't you?" Pierce asked to Data. Data gave a perplexed look but quickly realized he was being mistaken as the barkeep, deciding to stay in the assumed character by the Holodeck character, he responded.

"What would you like, sir?"

"A Martini, and the driest martini you have. The driest martini that will have me begging for a glass of water." Pierce said with a smile and a slap of the counter. Data's head tilted.

"So a Martini and a class of water?" Data asked, confused. McCoy laughed, Pierce being surprised by the apparent bartender's naiveté.

"Just get the good Doctor and myself a couple Martinis, Commander." McCoy said with a chuckle. Data still looked confused but he did as he was ordered.

"Commander? Is he military?" Pierce asked, pointing a long thumb at Data while looking at the aged man sitting next to him.

"In a way, yes and no. But enough of that, it's a pleasure to meet you Doctor Pierce." McCoy said with a big smile on face, like he was a small child eager to meet a celebrity. Pierce gave a perplexed look at the older man, but smiled.

"I don't hear my name much without that damn 'Captain' rank slapped on, these days." Pierce said with a scoff, as Data returned with the drinks.

"Is that so?" McCoy said with a smirk as he took his glass from the Android.

"Yeah, it honestly feels odd not hearing it now. Makes me think I'm not wearing this ugly green uniform, or sleeping on a cot with a family of cockroaches, who I all know their life stories! They even named their kids after me!"

McCoy laughed, loud and hard to his fellow Doctor's ranting. Pierce sipped the martini, smiled, then in a motion that McCoy had only ever seen Scotty pull off flawlessly; Pierce downed the entire glass in one gulp. He slammed the glass down, sighed and pondered for a moment. "This batch tastes better than the stuff from the still, but it lacks that kick." The alcoholic surgeon stated. McCoy took a swig of his own glass, he quickly realized that what he was drinking was synethol. While the fictional martini might get the Holographic Doctor besides him wasted, it would do nothing for himself. He wished for a moment that one of his old shipmates - his friends - were still around so he could get a good stiff drink. Scotty and himself usually kept a bottle around back on the old _Enterprise_.

Pierce raised his empty glass towards Data, fiddling with the glass in his fingers. "Another, Bartender!" Data complied and took the glass to refill. Pierce looked back at the physically older doctor. "So what's your story, _Admiral?_ " He asked with a sarcastic grin. McCoy laughed to the irony of Pierce's sarcasm.

"I _am_ an Admiral, Captain." He said with an equally sly grin to Pierce's, but it soon disappeared for a more earnest one as he out stretched his hand. "But my name Doctor Leonard McCoy." Pierce looked in what could described as shock, but he took the older doctor's hand and felt the surprisingly firm grasp from the old man.  
Data returned with the refilled martini, and handed it to Pierce, which he took gladly. He sipped at it before looking back to McCoy.

"So what did you specialize in?" Pierce asked. McCoy sipped at his drink till it was gone, then motioning to Data to get a refill, which the android did as instructed.

"You could say I was a Jack-of-all-trades in the medical field. Surgery, chemistry, psychology, dental, obstetrics, everything." The old doctor said, his memories looking back on all of his memories - especially those of his time on the old _Enterprise_. He smiled fondly as Data returned with McCoy's refill, and looked into the clear liquid. "But I always looked at myself as just an 'old country doctor'."

Pierce laughed and sipped his martini. "That sounds like something my father would say. I specialize as a surgeon - and a damned good one, thanks to the idiots who drafted me. Still, all I want to do is get home to ol' Crab-apple Cove, Maine, and tell everyone there to open up and say 'ah'.".

"So you're still in the military?" McCoy asked.

"Yeah, the U.S. Army in their infinite wisdom has yet to send me home."

McCoy then felt a pang of sadness, not just for his holographic companion, but for himself as memories of old days on the original _Enterprise_ came back to him, he suddenly missed Kirk, Scotty, Uhura, Sulu, Chekov, Chapel, and even Spock. Hawkeye saw the melencoly on his companion's face. McCoy shook off his own melencoly and focused his attention back at Pierce. "But I'm sure even after you head home after your service, you'll miss your coworkers."

"Miss them?" Pierce asked with a laugh, taking his companion's statement as if it was a joke. "I live with a man who can't stop talking about his daughter, and another who listens to Beetoven into the wee hours of the morning. And the living conditions are inhumane! I hate it, and I won't miss any of it in the slightest!" He finished as he gulped down the rest of his drink.

"I sincerely doubt that." McCoy stated with an all-knowing smile. Data took Pierce's glass and began to refill it. The old Doctor noticed how little was left of the liquor. Pierce looked back at the older Doctor with a skeptical face. McCoy quickly finished his glass and gestured to Data to refill it for the final time. "I used to think just like you, Hawkeye. When I served on my old ship as the chief Medical Officer, I often resented and complained about everything. But I enlisted for a reason: after my divorce, I just wanted to get away. The normal medical career paths didn't offer me a way to get far away enough from my problems, so I enlisted."

"What changed?" Pierce said, narrowing his eyes at McCoy, wondering where McCoy was going with this story.

"Nothing except that I became close with my shipmates. After a long 5 year mission, and when we returned to space dock, I left the service for a few years. I dabbled into various groups, trying to leave my days in the service behind, and my failed marriage even further behind. But I found myself loathing it. Then an important mission came up, and my former C.O pulled some strings and dragged me back into service - drafting me. I tried to be mad at him, but secretly I was glad. I stayed in the service till today."

The two men drank their liquor before Pierce spoke up. "And what happens today?"

McCoy finished his glass and put it down, with a sorrowful smile. "Today is my last day, and it'll be spent giving an inspection on the newest ship to bare the name of my old Ship. After this, I'm retired for good." He looked at the facilimy of Doctor Benjamin Franklin Pierce as he too finished his drink. McCoy reached out an old, withered hand and smiled warmly. Pierce returned the handshake, surprised at how firm the old man's grip was. "Thank you for the chat, Doctor Pierce."

"And thank you for the drink. It's been a pleasure, Doctor...?" Pierce trailed off as he realized he never learned his companion's name.

"Leonard McCoy." The old Doctor finished. Pierce nodded, and the two men ended their handshake. McCoy looked away, focusing on something else.

"Computer; end program." McCoy commanded. Within seconds the 20th Century Japanese Bar vanished along with Doctor Pierce, now revealing the black and yellow walls of the Holodeck. McCoy looked to Lt Commander Data. "Take me to the bridge." Data nodded and led the Admiral out and back into the corridor of the _Enterprise_ D.

There was several minutes of silence as they slowly walked. "Well it's a new ship and she's got the right name." McCoy stated as they walked, he turned to Data, "You remember that, you hear?"

"Yes, sir."

"Treat her like a lady and she'll always bring you home."

The End

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Author's Thoughts

I came up with the idea of this story years ago, around the time I came up with my DBZ story "The Unwalked Path". The original premise included a third doctor; Black Jack from the anime/manga "Black Jack" by Osamu Tezuka. You can look more into it, but the basic premise was that Black Jack was a Surgeon For Hire, who would take on odd medical cases. However I decided to not include Black Jack since his personality and his own series doesn't fit as well with McCoy and Hawkeye.  
I didn't start working on this till earlier this year after I finished my short Star Trek story "Cry of a Starship" after it finally hit me on how to make the setting of this story - the Holodeck. It was just a matter of writing it. It went well for a while but the problem was I wasn't sure what to have them talk about. I decided to just go with whatever. About a month ago I was close to finishing it, but I screwed up and got the file corrupted (thank god I had backups)  
Eventually I did come up with an ending, but I wasn't in the mood to write it. However I realized that it would be fitting to finish and upload it TODAY because today is the 7 year anniversary of my Father's death. He was a huge Star Trek fan, and a good fan of MASH.

So in Memory of my Dad; this is for you all to enjoy. 


End file.
